Category: sauron

Regular

Elves: Hey Sauron is getting pretty strong. Can we get some help over here?

Valar: We’re sending some wizards. 

Elves: Okay cool. How many?

Valar: Uh…five. 

Elves: Are they particularly powerful?

Valar: No. We’re starting them out on low power. We’ll increase it if we have to. 

Elves:

Elves: Really learning from the 1st age, aren’t you. 

Regular

Are we supposed to believe that Sauron needed the one ring to go on the outside of his armored glove? Just so that everyone would be able to see it? Would he really be that dramatic?

Regular

The three elves rings drew power from the One Ring but Sauron didn’t have any access to them. What a back-fire for him. How humiliating that must have been.

Regular

Mouth of Sauron: So you want me to go tell them that we’re torturing Frodo?

Sauron: Yeah

Mouth of Sauron: Do we actually have him?

Sauron: No, but we’re looking. 

Mouth of Sauron:

Mouth of Sauron: If they find out I’m bluffing, I’m gonna look really stupid. 

Sauron: They’re going to believe you. You’re very scary looking, Greg. 

Mouth of Sauron: Thanks. That means a lot. 

Regular

It’s never clarified that all of the Fell Beasts died after Sauron was destroyed, so I assume in the 4th age men tamed them and like, every family had one to fly around on.

Regular

“There is nothing that Sauron cannot turn to evil uses.” – The Two Towers

Things I want to see used for evil:

  • Hobbits
  • Lembas
  • Fatty Lumpkin
  • Boromir’s horn
  • Farmer Maggot’s bacon
  • Bombur

Everyone’s Biggest Fear

Men: Sauron taking over

Elves: Sauron taking over

Dwarves: Sauron taking over

Wizards: Sauron taking over

Hobbits: Poetry

Regular

In the movies, when Frodo put on the ring, Barad Dur always got real close and Sauron started whispering at him. I like to imagine that the same thing happened when Tom Bombadil put on the ring, and Tom said something like “Ho! Tom Bombadil, Tom Bombadilo!” and Sauron was like what the fuck is happening, who is this guy?

Regular

PLEASE SIGNAL BOOST: I’m trying to reboot LotR but this time, Barad Dur is a giant mech that Sauron uses to attack Gondor. I need the Tolkien family or Warner Bros to see this.

yuans-samurai-kathu: Annatar and Melkor

yuans-samurai-kathu:

Annatar and Melkor