Category: frodo

Gandalf: All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us. 

Frodo: I mean…yeah. 

Frodo: That’s just life. You have to decide things until you die. 

Frodo: That doesn’t help me at all. Unless you’re telling me to kill myself, and make the ring someone else’s problem? I suppose that would work though. 

Spiderman: Far From Home reminds me a lot of the scene in Lord of the Rings where Boromir does his whole ring monologue, if Frodo had said, “you know what, that sounds great. You totally should have the ring. Here you go. I can’t want to see what you do with this.”

Frodo: I will be the ringbearer. 

Gandalf: Oh jeez, Frodo is going to carry it? He’s so tiny, it’s going to take forever to walk to Mordor. 

Elrond: True. But what if someone carried him there?

*Long silence*

Aragorn: I will be the Hobbitbearer. 

‘Hold it up!’ said Gandalf. ‘And look closely!’

As Frodo did so, he now saw fine lines, finer than the finest pen-strokes, running along the ring, outside and inside: lines of fire that
seemed to form the letters of a flowing script. They shone piercingly
bright, and yet remote, as if out of a great depth. They read “If lost, return to Barad-Dur.” 

Frodo obviously becomes very concerned when he learns that Sauron wants to find him, but I have a hard time taking that scene seriously because 

“O Gandalf, best of friends, what am I to do?”

is just a ridiculous line that makes me laugh every time. 

Gandalf tells Frodo, “The Ring has awoken. It’s heard its master’s call,” which implies that the ring was asleep while Gollum had it, which I assume was the ring going into a coma to avoid hearing Gollum talking about fish or whatever. 

Frodo: The ring is mine!

Sam: You were the chosen one! It was said that you would destroy Sauron, not join him!

Satan: So you’ve been sent to hell for eternity. 

Me: Damn. What’s my punishment. 

Satan: You’re gonna be stuck with Greg. He’s a huge Lord of the Rings fan with a ton of theories about it that he wants to share with you. 

Me: That doesn’t sound that bad. 

Satan: They’re all really edgy and stupid. 

Greg: What if Frodo killed himself, and the vision of him sailing to Valinor is just his final wishes as he dies?

Me: Nooooooooooo. 

Frodo:  I will take the Ring, though I do not know the way. 

Elrond:  If I understand aright
all that I have heard, it sounds like I don’t have to do anything for this quest. I was worried that someone was going to say that, since I couldn’t stop Isildur the first time, it would be poetic for me to go back and finish the job myself. Honestly I was moments away from volunteering to do that. Thank god you spoke up first. Frodo, you have my blessing. I’m gonna go take a nap. 

Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Apparently Sauron was a Necromancer, so…yes? I think so? It’s not very clear but I’m gonna go with yes, as long as you’re okay with necromancy.