Category: ents

Me: so you know how the entwives are lost?

My friend: yeah

Me: and even if the ents wants to reproduce, they couldn’t?

My friend: where are you going with this?

Me: they’re technically incels. I mean just based on wh-

My friend: I’m going to murder you. 

Deep roots may not be reached by the frost, but if the deep roots loose of all of the women then that’s not exactly good either. 

My wife: why do you always take us to the mall that’s farther away? We have one so much closer.

Me: the street that the entrence is on has a sign that says “East Mall Ent” and I like that it says ent on it.

My wife: haha. What’s the real answer?

My wife: oh my god you’re not joking

So far I’ve convinced a number of people that, in Tolkien’s legendarium, the word “parent” comes from the pair of ents that would raise the young ones.

The music when the ents attack Isengard is wonderful, but I also would have accepted if they’d used “welcome to the jungle” for that scene.

Yavanna: so i think i should get creatures to protect the woods, like Aule has dwarves for the mountains.

Manwe: okay.

Yavanna: I want them to be really tall. And with giant beards, way bigger than a dwarf’s .

Manwe: uh…sure.

Yavanna: and I want their language to be really hard to learn. even harder than dwarvish.

Manwe: why, exactly?

Yavanna: all of this is very important to me, okay? deal with it. dwarves are dumb.

Treebeard said that elves are responsible for giving Ents their sentience, but that still wasn’t enough for the Ents to be on the elves’ side during the War of the Ring. Those are some high standards.